Stupid TN!

I felt for the past couple of weeks there might have been actual improvement with my Trigeminal Neuralgia; never let your guard down for one minute it seems. 

Shocks shocks ... Buzzzzzzz.... And pain, the searing pain that not only makes your remember the condition, but at the same time gives you that wish for a  quick death all the while reminding you that you are alive. I always prefer the reminder that I am alive, but would rather not have the painful reminder that goes with it.

I thought there was understanding

I really did; I thought my husband was more understanding to what I am going through. 

We had this conversation a few days ago, and he told me that if I had to leave my job we would make it work financially. But then I said last night that I was going to put in my 2 week notice, and he started to freak out about the finances.

Seriously, which is it? Is it ok ? Or not ok?

I am exhausted. I want to try to run my home business again, he says it would be worthless to try. I am slowly getting to my wits end on this matter.

Oh medicine

The fact that I am stuck taking a medication for my T.N. Isn't going to be the problem. The problem I am starting to see is how tired I am while being on the medication.

Sometimes I feel like the island in the ocean

Ever since I told my family what my condition might be it seems as though they are avoiding me. It probably isn't so, but it sure seems coincidental that the chatting has gone down to a nothing.

High days, low days

I have realized that with this comes many highs and lows. For instance Friday was almost unbearable, pain wise. Where today there has barely been any. I will need to be sure to remember that although the pain can strike at any time, I can't stop living my life. And I can't live my life stressing out over the next time the pain will hit. I need to learn to roll with it. 

Good day, not so good day

First full day taking calls, I actually like it a lot. But at the same time, first day of little pain spikes all through out the day. Thank goodness for pain meds to take the edge off. 

Living with this is hard, sometimes really hard; but I will continue to push forward as long as possible.

Old and New

Originally I started this blog as a fun way to express that although I am not a twenty or thirty something I am still here to have fun. This blog will evolve. Not only will I post about geeky things, but also with the newest trial in my life; nerve pain. Not only just nerve pain, but some of the worst nerve pain one can endure, nerve pain in the face. So follow along as I geek over things and deal with my daily battle. Let the games begin!